Focus

I've been writing. Sounds great doesn't it? A simple statement all the more evocative, because that's the entire point. The need to write. The desire to pound fingertips across the keyboard and get things fixed down before they start driving you nuts. Well me anyway. And it's a good thing I've been able to. I get seriously cranky when I go too long without writing.

To be fair, I also get cranky when the words don't flow out the way I want them to. Or when I get interrupted. Or when I'm deep in thought and someone says something to distract me and I lose my train of thought. (Ouch!) Or when I get cut off by some idiot. (Ok, I only get cranky then if my kids are in the car.) Gee, I'm an awfully cranky person.

Not that that bit of personal reflection has much bearing on my current focus. Focus. Focusing on focus. Sounds funny to me, but it's something I need to do. There are so many distractions that can keep me from my writing. Stray thoughts that will zap me from the marathon playing out in my mind.

My biggest distraction is my family. I've tried writing during the day, but invariably one of my kids needs something right that instant. You know the one. Just when I'm about to make a breakthrough. Really getting a description down, or figuring out the precise way to word something for the most effect. And I hate turning them away. Their draw on my attention is just as insistent as my writing. (My sanity vs their well-being. I go with their well-being every time.) So, I changed to writing at night after they're in bed. That worked until my husband had to tell me something. Or just had to show me something he found interesting. (Or something he wanted for Christmas, his birthday, or Father's day.)

It was terribly frustrating. My family held my attention and wouldn't let me escape for a few minutes. Or hours. Or days. (Just kidding on that last one. ;) ) It didn't matter how important writing was to me, my family needed my attention. Finally I came up with a solution. I'd get up an hour and half earlier every day to write. Big sacrifice for me, because I love my sleep. Rough enough when I needed to get up and shoo the kids to school, or make the younger one's breakfast. (Years ago I learned how to make oatmeal or pour a bowl of cereal in a fog, before I had my morning coffee.) Now here I was voluntarily going without sleep!

It was intimidating. I think the first few days I just stared at my computer. Puttered out a sentence or two. Went to bed earlier at night. Drank gallons of coffee in the morning. Stared blearily at my phone when the alarm went off to wake up the kids. But the more I did it, the more the words flowed. I was able to write up a scene, or at least a few paragraphs. Slowly I was making progress. I made more after I stopped looking everything up online. (I love to research.)

Then my husband had a trip he had to take. (And my mother, sister, and two nephews came to visit.) My writing time disappeared as I took on the temporary role of single parent. (My heart goes out to those that don't have it temporary. Being a single parent is one of the hardest things to do! I do it frequently, but lucky for my sanity, not all the time.) For two entire months I didn't write anything. (I'll spare you the details, they weren't pretty.)

When the kids went back to school after the holiday, I went back to writing. For a solid week I've gotten up early to write. And you know what? It's not so bad to go without those extra hours of sleep when I'm doing something I love. It all balances out. I get some writing done. I'm alert and more prepared to send my kids off to school. And I'm not as cranky. (My husband might argue that point, but I don't feel as cranky.) So, it's all about focusing when and where I need it.

Focus on my writing first thing in the morning. Remind my husband when it's time for him to get up. Focus on my two older kids while they get ready for school. Focus on my younger two when they get up. And split focus on my house, the kids, (and ok the tv too) during the day. Focus on my family after the three wandering members come home. Then sneak off to bed the first chance I get!